This letter provided Source: HarperCollins advice to help make sex pleasurable that, sadly, too few of you had been taught. In fact, just the opposite is true: Second, there's also a gap among women based on their self-identified sexual orientation. In this same study mentioned earlier, lesbian women had significantly more orgasms than heterosexual women. But, in retrospect, this was a mistake for two reasons.
First, in both of these studies, bisexual women were also having significantly fewer orgasms than were lesbian women. ALL women can use information to enhance their sexual pleasure. Research shows that these images lead girls and women to constantly assess how they appear to others. Most movies mainstream and porn show women having amazing orgasms from penetration alone. As I say in my upcoming book, Becoming Cliterate , the false idea that women should orgasm from male thrusting alone is the number 1 reason for the orgasm gap.
Instead, as I will tell you about in more detail in future letters, in order to orgasm, the vast majority of women up to 95 percent need some kind of clitoral stimulation, either alone or coupled with penetration.
Still, like I said earlier, it's not only when women have sex with men that they have orgasm problems, and the rest of the cultural issues below can affect any of you, regardless of who you have sex with. Media images of sexy, beautiful, thin women lead many of us to dislike our bodies. Women are judged more harshly than men for having casual sex.
Most of us have little to no training in sexual communication. Good communication is especially critical when it comes pun intended! Can you relate to anything on this list? If you identify as heterosexual or have sex with men, have you thought you were "supposed to" orgasm during intercourse?
Or, regardless of how you identify or who you have sex with, have you ever felt ashamed of your body during sex? We have to give individual women including you , the attitudes and skills needed to orgasm, including feeling like you deserve pleasure, knowledge of your body, and the skills to tell partners what you need.