Larger text size Very large text size Some jobs you never see advertised. Think Hollywood actor, astronaut, adventurer. They're also the kind of professions people fantasise about, but if we sat down and realistically thought through what would be required to do them, most of us would conclude they're beyond our skill set.
Male escorting is similar. Imagine that occupation listed in the classified ads: Excellent pay, flexible hours, immediate start. Unlike female escorts - who tend to charge by the hour - a standard booking for a male escort generally involves a minimum of two hours. This is because most female clients don't just want sex, but conversation and affection, too. So yes, you will need to be a god in bed, but you'll also be required to play counsellor and friend. To be a good male escort, you'll need to be a good listener and able to understand your clients' needs.
To be a great one, you'll need to know and understand their stories. Now 55, she sees the marriage for what it's become: Over the years she's endured her husband's affairs two , lies countless and a period where he rented a place with another woman, insisting she was just a "flatmate". Ryan James says to be a successful escort you need to get enjoyment from pleasing others. Tim Bauer Advertisement Davies knows she should have left her husband years ago, but the reality of divorce - dissolving their joint mortgage, disentangling their finances - meant staying in the marriage was the more practical option.
Last year, Davies decided to put herself first. She started going out more. She went to a rock concert and screamed her lungs out like a teenager. She hired a personal trainer and lost 10 kilograms. When she looks in the mirror now, she sees someone who looks at least a decade younger. Meanwhile, her husband scolds her and says she's going wild. The unfairness of his affairs gnawed at Davies: She confronted him one night: Later, when Davies joked with a friend that she might as well just hire someone for sex, her friend's response - "Well, what's stopping you?
She ran some online searches and came across a Sydney-based escort with the professional name Ryan James; a blond, clean-cut calendar boy. Her main concerns were cost, discretion and health risks. Just looking at the physical appearance of the guy - and the fact that he's a personal trainer - made me feel more confident. Adria says he spends time making himself look good and expects the same from clients.
Tim Bauer Several emails and text messages later, Davies flew from her Queensland home to meet James in the foyer of a Sydney hotel. After heading up to her room together, James asked for his money and then asked Davies to take a shower.
After the shower, they moved to the couch, where he started to undress her. It was the first time Davies had taken off her clothes in front of a man other than her husband or her doctor. She knew this was a job for James - just work, nothing more - but says there was still a thrill in knowing that having sex with her wasn't going to be a chore for him. All Davies will divulge of the experience are the comments, "Believe me, it was good. I certainly wasn't disappointed. Ryan James looks exactly as he does in his online photos: For seven years, he had a brain-corroding desk job in finance.
It is a job, but it's a very enjoyable job. First, he's not in this job because he has an unusually high libido. As soon as they're with a client they're not particularly attracted to, they fail. James thinks for a minute. In fact, he's never heard of any heterosexual male escort who's been forced into the profession - they choose to be there.
I read him a quote by writer, Fairfax columnist and anti-pornography crusader Melinda Tankard Reist: Some are doctors, lawyers or psychologists, but they prefer not to do that as they find this work more rewarding.
She sent him a text message that said, "Thank you so much - I've had the experience of a lifetime. You're an amazing person that's [sic] made me very happy. I ask why she's crying. It was a moment of feeling self-worth and feeling special, feeling like I was someone It had been a long time, "a hell of a long time, probably the majority of my marriage, to be quite honest" - since anyone had made Davies feel that way.
He is lovely to me, he makes me feel like a woman. It's business, but I still feel very desirable with him. When he comes to the hotel room, she now knows to leave the money on the side table before they start. She also feels her time with him has helped clarify her relationship with her husband, settled old scores about his affairs - at least in her mind - and made her reconsider the potential for other men in her life.
It's impossible to determine how many male escorts work in Australia, but agencies and workers will tell you there are more female sex workers than male, and definitely more male-for-male sex workers than male-for-female. Exclusively heterosexual male escort work is still a niche industry in Australia.
The market is so new that Cameron Cox, of Sydney's Sex Workers' Outreach Project, says that five years ago one Sydney escort agency even approached gay male sex workers to do "straight for pay". But every straight male escort I spoke to said business had only picked up since they started working.
The industry may be boutique, but if you're good, your client base will grow. Over the past year, James may only have had 30 clients, but many are repeat customers who book him every fortnight. Similarly, there's no such thing as a "typical escort". If you're interested in escorting and don't resemble a muscled, waxed calendar boy, you needn't despair.
In the US, there is an escort named Sugar Weasel who will, upon request, arrive at your home or hotel dressed as a white-bodied clown. Another male escort named Vincent splits time between Washington DC and Toronto and describes himself as an "adult entertainment entrepreneur". Vincent is in his 70s. Apparently, both are popular.
John Oh, 41, is a cm, Sydney-based male escort with pale skin, prematurely grey hair and big hands. He looks like a handsome naturopath.
Most of his clients are older women who have teenage or grown-up children and the idea of having sex with someone in their 20s gives them the creeps. Forty-seven is a very specific age, I say. A lot of women get to 47 and find themselves single again.
There's a stainless-steel kitchen, a large flat-screen TV hooked up to music, and an acoustic guitar on a stand. The mattress on the bedroom floor doesn't have a base and still has crumpled sheets, most likely from his last booking, which only finished an hour before we meet.
When a client visits Oh, he'll buzz her in and then they'll share a cup of tea or a glass of wine. It's all rather wholesome. His next step is always to offer a massage so he can initiate more physical contact without the client having to request it. They've come out of a relationship - a marriage of 20 or 30 years - so they may have had very few partners in their lives.
The prospect of getting back into dating is hugely intimidating. What they're looking for is a soft beginning. Her seven-year relationship with a woman had ended and she wanted to ease herself back into the world of men without resorting to the bar and club scene. Ward is a likeable, energetic year-old, based in Sydney, who works as a cosmetic surgery nurse - "Botox, fillers, that sort of thing" - and has an infectious toucan squawk of a laugh.
She wears sequinned, body-hugging clothes and has bold magenta streaks in her hair. You get the sense she'd have no problems picking up anyone of either sex. She is athletic and healthy-looking when we meet, but weighed more than kilograms when she broke up with her partner.
As a bigger woman, she didn't like the prospect of going to a bar by herself. She made the booking, had her hair and make-up done, took the day off work and booked a hotel in Potts Point.
Wearing a double-denim ensemble, he has tanned skin, dark shiny hair, calf-like brown eyes and a stud in his left ear. At 27, he is already a veteran of the industry. The first time he was paid for sex, he was Finally, she asked him what time he finished his shift, adding, "Since I paid you for your services, can you return the favour?
He figured he'd earned a lot of money in a short period of time, and that hospitality wages weren't great. He also found the woman attractive. It was a sexy scenario. At first, he signed with an agency, but didn't get any work for six months. So he took matters into his own hands, got some professional photos taken and started his own website. Most of the time he can get and maintain an erection naturally, though he adds, "If my head space is not there, I'm stressed or I've got other stuff going on in my personal life He's never slept with a man, despite it being a popular request.
I'm not physically attracted But extreme fetishes - peeing and pooping - no. John Oh agrees, adding that finding yourself being desired is a huge turn-on in itself.