Magazines tend to avoid these tricky bits and highlight either the extraordinarily sexy intercourse, orgasm, etcetera or the extraordinarily awkward hit my head on the headboard, broke my arm, so forth. Here are some that I think are important to know. These tips are primarily directed towards opposite sex couples but many can be used for same-sex couples as well.
While they focus on first-time sexers, some apply to those who are simply having sex with a new partner. How do you begin, and how do you switch positions? Who inserts the penis? What position do you start in? These questions all vary depending on your preference. Generally whoever is on top can do most of the guiding, though if there is trouble, the other person can assist. Switching positions is easy enough.
It is possible to continue having sex while you rotate into new positions. Many positions are simply variations of the same position with legs at different angles.
What do you do after ejaculation? If you are ejaculating into a condom, hold the base of the condom, and slide out of your partner. This prevents the condom from slipping off inside of your partner. Troublesome for both vaginal and anal sex. If you are ejaculating in your partner, you might provide them with a towel. Some find that they are susceptible to UTIs if they do not urinate after sex. If you can, drink some water, or pee after cleaning up.
What should you keep in your apartment for a casual partner? Keeping a little pack of items in your room for potential partners can be a lifesaver. The same list can be applied to committed relationships or casual relationships. A small trashcan with a lid and a liner. A necessity for every bathroom. Mouthwash and floss is great too. What if you come first?
What if no one comes? Orgasm can be a point of particular stress for both men and women. Typically, women stress about being unable to orgasm. Men stress about making a woman orgasm and making a woman come first. Men typically have a longer reload time than woman. Your reload time is the time between your ejaculation and when you can become erect again. While a woman may be able to orgasm and continue having sex, a man will likely have to wait a period of time before continuing.
This is why often times men will attempt to help their female partner get off first. While this is a good effort, sex is much more complex when it gets down to it. One or both of you may not be able to orgasm. Someone may orgasm first and might not want to continue right away.
Recognize those emotions and try to enjoy your sexuality in ways that extend beyond orgasm, or simultaneous orgasms. This is true with the first time you have sex, and the first time you have sex with a new partner. That means no spitting, no slapping their ass, no calling them names, no tying them down or holding them down, and no surprise sex toys.
These are things that not everyone likes and, as with sex itself, deserve a conversation, and given consent. That means knowing the anatomy and where it is, being able to stimulate the good-feeling-areas, being able to become aroused and stay aroused, and actually having sex oral, fingering, intercourse with little issue. It also involves developing your own sexy persona. Have a question about sex or sexuality?